Love is the red of the rose on your coffin door

Rena; Ho, thankyou! :D:D
Hazel; Hey, I know it's kinda hard to find luh :(
Fang; Haha yesyes!
Shirl; You must! :D
Anon; You can add me in MSN if you feel uncomfortable to reveal your identity here (: It's up to you whether you wanna stay as the way you are now or whatever.
Grace; Grace! :D
Alethia; Thanks dear (:
Caroline; You mean hell lot to you & you definitely know the reason behind this. (: I love you Rol, I don't want you to upset. Life's definitely more than just about the past. I was a little straight-forward in the conversation but my main objective is to get facts into your head. (: Glad that you got what I said yuh? (: I love you!
Anon; Your comment got me laughing. Hero or idol, she's none. She's my friend. (:

Thanks for commenting, loves. (:

I just want your body right next to mine, exchanging body heat on this passenger seat. Y

I'm helping mom with the songs. She's been bothering me for it since Idontknow when & I've been procrasinating since then. Lol, how great. But I've decided that I should do it for her now & I'm doing it. :/ Ugh.

Today's Sciences paper is, the same, screwed up, as usual. Okay seriously I tried making an effort to at least study, make notes, memorise the definitions & remember the parts. I did, I really did. Although that effort isn't enough... :/ Heh. But whatever. It's over so I'll just let it be.

IT'S THE LAST PAPER TMR :D !! Maths paper II & I'm done. I'll be busy with Cousin's wedding dinner's preparation. :D Yay! She's gonna look so gorgeous on that day. The decorations are fuck damn expensive but fucking pretty. & yknow where it's held? Fullerton Hotel. $&%$!@%#&%$%#@%#@^%$# Fuck man!! :/ Ok relax glyn.

I'm done with Qiaos' new skin. Waiting for her approval & I'll do it up in her blog. Helping Jovene now to publish her skin in Blogskins but damn Blogskins isn't nice today. I guess I gotta try again later. I feel like playing with Photoshop now. Asmine's skills are goddamned good & she can tell me mine is better. -.- Bullshit. Hahha. I'm done with mom's music too. Yay now I feel rather accomplished. (: I'll do some maths revision later on.

It kinda hurts to know who came by & I guess clicking on that link got me to a place where I don't wanna be. I felt like crying when I saw their photos together. We used to talk about you, & him, you know? :/ How happy you both were, the same couple rings the four us have with different engravement. How she envied you both whenever she sees the two of you loveydovey @ class. I felt sorry when I know I couldn't be there in the same class with her. I don't know. All these just brings back to who I used to be.

I don't know if I'm still willing to give you my heart, whether I'm prepared for you to break it again. I'm afraid. I haven't been sparing a thought for this fatigued heart that has been tearing & breaking up. I haven't realised how tough this heart has been. Frankly, I don't know what I want. I don't know where am I heading. I don't know what I wanna do now, what's my next time. All I'm doing is just, studying. Just plain studying. I'm trying to find time for my passion & time for my loves. Well, life is short. Whatt if I die tmr? There's so many things I wanna do. I'll regret big time if I die right now. Ugh.

You once said to me, "Tell her how you feel & just it go okay?" Do you remember? Well, I guess you do not. Or rather you don't even want to. :/

"Go study ok. Call me when you're done or something. I'll be studying too, so don't worry k. Love you sexy bastard. <3!"
"Huh but I can't study."
"Ay be good & go study ok?"
"You know why I cannot study not.. I want you to ask why."
"Okay why? 'Cos got food right? 'Cos got games right? Or because FHM magazine is right in front of you!?"
"No, 'cos this girl who's talking to me now is stucked in my head."
"Weiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Stop making me smile to myself. Go study ok. Love chew."
"Like that only ah."
"Shut up & go. If not, I won't answer your call later. -.-"

Baby let's give love a try (:
I love chew.

Ben asked me to go SP with them on Thursday. How? Go or not to go? Ben knows why I don't wanna step into that school again, still ask. -.-



Never say forever 'cos nothing last.
<3.

3:14 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

If I die in my sleep, are you still willing to be everything you promised you'd be?

No comments to reply, damn fucking sad. :(


( Click to Enlarge! )







That's the animation I made the other day, along with another that I made just for my lloves. Rounded edges was what I learnt from Jasminek, that sweetie. I do learn something new everyday, do I? (:

My voice became your passion, your love became my obsession. It's sweet, yet dangerous, just how you wanted it to be. <3<3<3.

I got awoken up this morning by tutor's phone call 'cos I took the study's phone into the room. It was ringing ever so loudly, why wouldn't it wake me up? What's more when it's two phones ringing at the same time with different sharp ringing tones. But I refused to get up to answer it, knowing that it's from her. Maid came in to answer it instead. [: Lazed around in bed, texted _ & all. Finally decide to get outta bed @ 10am. The sleep was good, no disturbance until morning when Zel was going for her Jap class. It's been long since I slept so soundly, I'm sure. (:

Oh I forgot to mention, I could hardly breathe at times recently. :/ Which kinda scare me. I need make a trip down to the polyclinic& get an inhaler before anything happen, just in case. I hate such breathless night, especially when I'm without you. And that kinda explain the often heard & said sentence "I can't breathe without you". I guess that's rather true, for me.

Breakfast was great (: Thanks to Zel, the surprise McMuffin without Egg. [: With the red sticker which says "Special Order". :D Trigger happy. Lazed around in the study. Packed my stuff, it is still as messy, I know. Got out my sciences books & notes. Man, there's so much to study, really. I must endure another few more sleepless nights of studying, understanding, writing endless notes & memorising. Right so while I'm typing this, there're birds flying around the window which is just next me. I'm afraid it might fly in & peck on my head. Ouch. What wonderful imagination dya have, Glyn. I wanna be able to sleep well at night, not worrying for someone & my studies. :/ I'll be a complete geek (inserts geek emotion) 'til Ns are over then it's time to party !! -dances around

Dad talked to me just now. He asked what's the criteria for Ns. So I explained to him. & he asked if I can pass four subjects. It's an obviousss no. Look, six subject I do; English, Maths, Chinese, Comb. Science, Comb. Humans & Art. I'm pretty sure I'd pass English, hopefully Maths would too, it'd be a miracle if I can pass my Chinese, I need to work very hard for my Sciences in order to pass, Imma' fail Com. Humans for sure, Art is unpredictable. & the reason why dad asked all these is bcause... "If you can pass four subjects ah, okay, I'll get you a laptop. All yours, I can't stop you from using it." That was his exact words. Fuckadoodeldee! They know this would definitely motivate me for sure, for sure!! Fuckfuckfuck. I seriously think I'll study ultra hard for my Ns this time. Goddddddddd. :D

Tuition was good. Tutor asked about ___ again. :/ That was the first thing she said to me after I closed the door. Ohwell. So we did Maths, in preparation for my paper II which I doubt I'll pass this time for Prelims. Heh I've got the laptop as motivation now. Gosh. Tuition was good, did a quite a few questions.

Cherilyn came before that, getting all ready to go for NDP preview. They were singing karaoke in the room while I was having tuition la & I was wondering who the fuck is singing. Hahah! Dad sent them there while I stayed home to clean up my study room. Helped my maid to prepare dinner! :D Got the lettuce sliced & the luncheon meat diced! You see, I can be in the kitchen too. I'm gonna help her fry the eggs later :D:D Hopefully I don't screw it up & I do not burn the kitchen. :/

I love Theresa, my UOYEVOLI twinnie. [: She's so loveeeeee, seriously! Hugs& kisses. Hons, you've got me for all time & babe, you know I do love you! I'm always here okay? You've got a piece of me with you.

I realised something & it's definitely something I hate to admit to. When you left, you took the biggest part of me with you. & I guess that's why even 'til right now, I still can feel where you are, what you're doing, whether you're doing well, whether you need someone to be there. This sixth sense that I have for you, did not die. I'm sorry if you find this freaky but it's true. I suppose I'll never be able to feel this way with anyone else.

Tell me there is more to this than meets the eye, just tell me you & I aren't gonna be another lie, baby. I love you. <3!

Same sentence as I said in last Saturday's post.
I love you Saturday, I found peace & joy in you. (:

Tell me I'm wrong when I say, I can't expect you to spend forever with me.
<3.

12:18 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

You almost always pick the best time to drop the worst lines
Serene; I'll link you up soon. You label crisis! Haha. [: You're missed too, appear soon!
Michelle; I didn't expect you to read it either. See you.
Angie; Hey I'll relink you then. (: I'm good, almost fine.
Rena; Thanks babe, love you [:
Shirl; :D YAY! Aw you're not coming online yet D:
Eilis; We really must go drinking soon ok? :D Heh. I love you! Be happy kay, Eilis. [:
Shuhui; It's just a eyecandy, my dear. Don't go think so much, it's just a eyecandy! :D
Puayleng; Haha tell me when you see me online allright? (:
Grace; Nono I don't mind, as long as you tell me that you're using them [: Haha credits goes t me of course! :D Heh. Now it can be seen, so happy. :]
Alethia; -sings. Haha allright [: Sure no problem babe. Love you (:

This bed gets so damn cold && I hate sleeping here alone. :(
I need you.

I slept @ 10pm last night. Pert called me later on @ 12plus to wake me up to study. Read my notes, wrote a little. Hung up. Fuck you. Texted & all. Slept @ 145am. Had no difficulties waking up this morning. Man, I realised in 5 days, I think I slept less than 30 hours.

When I see your smile
Tears run down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm stronger I've figured out
How this world turns cold and breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one

School was only one & a half hours long. Had literature paper. Miss Yeo's damn evil la please. I thought there'd be characters description or whatever. So I went to memorise Desmond & Dickie's points & quotes. Rahh, shit you la. Damn! Ok whatever glyn, it's already over. Sass said she wanted to drop by my place after the paper this morning but Yj's text came & she met her outside school. Talked for awhile with Serene, Kelly & Emill. Walked home with them, while they walk to Compass. [: Got home, showered. Started making my cheesecake & all :D

Qiaos called later on & said she's coming over with Shyan to accompany me. After she hang up, Sass called saying that she's coming over with Yj to watch High School Musical. -.- See how conicidental this can get. So I texted Qiaos & told her that Sass is coming up too, so asked her to call her & coming tgr. 15 minutes later, they arrived. [: So we watched Truth About Love in my room. Yj played the piano while we were watching, haha. The show is fuck nice luh, it's my fifth time watching it already :D Heh. After watching, sat around @ the living room, watched teevee. I had my lunch & they had their chips. Wow, seriously, it's been long since I ate chips. Today, I finally did. :D

Went into the study when mom was coming home. Haha Yj's scared of Zel 'cos Zel said that she was scared of her once. -.- She was like "Oh your sister come back already!!" & she started to arrange herself, sitting upright & all. Haha how stupid! So we were in the study. Mom came home & they were like gussing if mom's gonna come in. Haha mom didn't come in, in the end. Yj's scared of parents, especially mothers, therefore she's scared of my mom. Haha damn funny. A pity we didn't take any photos nor video today :( Ohwell, another time then [:

I'm enjoying my currfy puff from Old Chang Kee. Mmmmm (: Smells gooooood! Thanks daddy (:

So they left around 1plus, 2pm. Bummed around. Zaeron called. Talked & bitched. :D Hung up after talking for 45 minutes. Did my stuff & all. Helped Zel in her blog :D Went to my bedroom & watched teevee :D That guy, I forgot what's his name!! He's a damn funny guyyyy. He can sing & dance quite well. He sang a song with Jolin & another with XiaoS!! His nickname is Xiao Zhu? Yuh I think so. He's damn funny & yesterday was his birthday. [: Then got to the living room & watched HollandV. :D Dad came back, had dinner & I'm here!. How detailed.

Talking to Nicole online & sending Alethia songs & enjoying my currypuff, currently [:

I finally passed Akina the empty disc. Like finallyyyyy. Oh Akina, by the way, I made three skins already. Go check it out yuh? [: Love you, my #1 fan!.

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Michelle Branch's Tuesday Morning is playing. I love her songs.
Please don't drive me home tonight
'Cos I don't wanna feel alone
Please don't drive me home tonight
'Cos I don't wanna go


&&, you said that I wouldn't get anywhere with a tank of gas & an empty heart. But baby, you know what? I have you. <3

You're tempted to break my heart, I can tell.
<3.

8:34 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

Creep up & tell me you love me more each time you look into my eyes
If I said your smile's all that mattered, would you save my life? Y

I'm shaking my leg like nobody's business. My eyes are shutting & I'm trying to keep awake. Maine's comment in my comment box came to a surprise to me but I guess what she said was really true.

"Heartbreaks can last for as long as you let it, it will tear as deep as you allow it to, but the test is not how soon you forget but how uou were able to heal and learn (: Take care." -Maine

Btw no comments to reply tday, I replied Anne & Maine in their blogs already (: I've learnt from it & I hope it's healing. [:

&&, the best that you could hope for, is hardly the best.
True enough. (:

Wtf 'm falling asleep, should I go to sleep & read my Lit book later? Okay nevermind I just had Yakult & it's kinda keeping me awake. Wtf, actually Yakult doesn't keep one awake right? Ok what nonsense. I wanted to sleep early & wake up later when Pert calls & I'll hit the books but I was busy talking to Shirl online :D Love that girl, by the way. (:

I was llooking for a particular entry for Shirl to read it again, then I read the archives. I don't know why but I just cried. Look @ the past when everything was @ it's right place, unlike now. Things are falling apart & my world is crumbling down or rather, has crumbled down. I'm watching them going down, there's nothing I can do about it. I hope things would get better soon. :( Called Pert after that. Talked, she did the cheering up & all. Thanks a lot, you (: I was fine awhile later when she kept saying that funny sentence she taught me the other day. Studied & all. I was feeling damn crappy & all. Slept @ 2am.

Maths paper was allright tday. I double-checked, or rather, triple-checked. I hope I'd do well this time. SS was screwed up. Source-based was okay but Essay questions was damn shit. I barely word a few words like give teacher face. Haha I really don't know what to write! =/ Whatever that I've slept hours memorising didn't come out but those that I didn't, all appeared. Wtf >:( Went t Compass after school, deposit some money & went home. Fucking hell tired. Rahh.

Sometimes physical pain can heal the emotional pain.

Let's commit the perfect crime I'll steal your heart, you steal mine <3.
I love you & you know that dotcha? (:

Far from lonely.

Sometimes when I run off it's because I want you to follow me.
<3.

2:50 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

I'm wishing that you weren't a part of my past at all

Celeste; Hey thanks same t you too!
Michelle; Wahlau fucking long. You find it boring but not for others. There're people who ask me to write longer, ha. If it's boring to you then, don't read all lor. Haha. Skip here & there a little. I bet when you're commenting you're a little too high to comment. Haha don't know what talking you sial! See you tmr.
Shirl; I see you online. :D You're away, watching sgidols! :(
Alethia; Haha allright, sure no problem. Welcome! :D
Akiko; Good that you like it. See youuuuuuuuu (:

&& I'll place my head next to your heart & whisper the three words you've longed to hear. <3

I'm supposed to be studying but 'm having a supa nice talk with Pearlene [: She taught me quite a few things tday & I'm glad. We knew each other since last year I think? Can't really remember when though but I know I met her before MidwestLoveAffair came, it was TheUnloved one. [: Aw man, those times when I'd come online && talk to her like no tomorrow! I'm glad we've caught up a little on MSN just now & she really taught me a lot of things. She said I'm a tough nut, one of the toughest she know. Ah, I love her!

Last night, asthma came knocking on my doors & I stupidly went to open it. Fuckshitz, I couldn't sleep well 'cos I can hardly breathe. Pert called @ 1am, LH texted me before that but I didn't reply. Goddamned tired. Talked till 2plus & went off to sleep. Yawns, couldn't wake up this morning somehow.

You'd definitely wanna know what my Horoscope says about tday if you know how fucked up my life is.

The Bottom Line
Your ideas can give a stale situation a new freshness, so don't be shy. Speak up!

In Detail
If the folks around you are missing something that you think is really obvious, why don't you speak up? Chances are, your alert will improve the situation for everyone. Let their (sure to be) positive reactions boost your ego and give you the confidence you need to share your thoughts more often. You have a fresh way of thinking, and in certain situations, you're downright innovative. Don't let the fear of their dismay stop you from saying what you think.

How these things could be so true sometimes. It's not that I don't want to, it's that the courage doesn't flow. :( -looks @ Pearlene. Those in italic are so fucken true.

English paper tday was quite allright. I got the report format wrong again, fuckshit. It always happens! Ohmy, I'm so dead but whatever. What is done, can't be undone. Oral after school! Chinese Ns oral. Omg the teachers were being so moronic. They actually like laughed at me. Okay my chinese's like shit la I know but hey! You so mean, you mean little thing. :( ay but maybe they're laughing with me. Hahha. It was allright afterall. Got outta school around 330pm & took a cab home. The weather kills, seriously! Omg! Got home, showered & used the com.

I don't know what to say, I don't know what to do. I feel lost, but it's okay, it's not the first time I'm feeling this way. I feel abandoned, again, it's okay 'cos it isn't the first time anyway. You feel good doing this then okay, fine, go ahead. But you know what? I'm out of touch. I'm almost losing it. I'm almost going crazy. You know I'd go miles for you. Thanks to the reality, so jaded. I hate to say goodbye but this time I guess I have to.
Goodbye to everything we ever knew.

I finally updated my LJ :D I know how t make LJ layouts already! :D Thanks to Pearlene [: I'm gonna sleep then wake up later when Pert calls & study! :D Kristle suggested that way. Oh I forgot to mention that Kristle & I are having messaging marathon again :D I miss her please, so pretty much!.

You had me several months ago when I was still quite naive. Well you said that we made such a pretty pair && that you would never leave. But you gave away the things you loved & one of them was me.

I gotta thank you for leaving me with a broken heart to mend. < /3


When your kiss & mine collide.
<3.

5:34 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

I know to have something like this broken is hard to fix
Anon; I don't know you but you have a crush on me. Who are you?
Shirl; I'm online nowwwww. >:( frowns
Nicole; Okok, dislike. Right, keep cool.
Akina; Hello! I hope you'd like it yeh? Hugs!
Rena; You should stay happy. [:
Michelle; I'm a honest kid :D You can't help for agree. More like Glynis rock your life. [: That sound more like it.

Thanks for commenting [: Love!

&& if I could do anything, it'd be to kiss you in the middle of the street on the rainiest day of the year. <3

Skyped with Emrys was fun, he's funny. His room is so small. Just enough for a bed & a computer table. How pathetic, ohmy. Slept super early last night. Pert called & we talked for awhile. I asked her to teach me something new everyday. Holymama, she taught me a damn funny phrase. Fuck man, I'm laughing once again. I was rolling on the sheets when she told me. She even do the hip-hop version, that turn table thing. Damn crappy. [:

I'm sorry but you know it better && clearer than anyone else why I won't want a get-together.

Chinese was fuckshit. Letter-writing was okay, but when it came to the compo part, I got damn frikkin' tired so I just barely scribbled through& went to sleep. Haha. I don't even know how to read! After Paper I, Sass & I rushed down to have a quick bite. Came back within 9 minutes :D How fast. Second paper was allright. Compre was a meaningful one. The writer talked about being poor. The author used to be so poor that he has tattered uniform. Though he has this pride problem towards such things, he told himself that his achievements are important. & he said that having been poor once taught him a precious lesson. It taught him how to cherish, treasure & appreciate. Appreciate whatever's left on the table during meals, Cherish his loved ones, Treasure all that he have before him & never ever take things for granted. Immediately it reminded me of someone. & that's the reason why I'm feeling so melancholy right now. Right so after the papers, I went home. A quiet walk home was good (: On the way, the parrot greeted me. How cute! [:

You're my best friend &&for some reason, you just drifted away.
I miss you, I miss us.

"I can't wait to fall asleep."
"Uh, feeling tired? You wanna --"
"No."
"Uh then why?"
"I simply love my dreams."
"Ohh, hm what're they about?"
"You."

"Ay I ask you something!"
"Yeh?"
"If, erm, you could have one night with any one in the world - Famous or not, who'd you pick?"
"You."

I swear, sometimes I'm so afraid of asking you questions && getting answers from you.

I have to agree with Charlie Brown.
Charlie Brown: I think I'm afraid to be happy
Lucy: How can you be afraid to be happy?
Charlie Brown: Because whenever you get too happy, something bad always happens.
I'm thinking of all the bad things that is happening in my life right now.

I'm sorry I'm not dwelling on the past but I have to say this, just me say this.
I hope the next girl who holds your hand holds on a little tighter than I did &realises how lucky she is to have you. Because when I had you, I held a little looser so that you could breathe && I felt like I was the luckiest girll in the universe to have you by my side, through every thunder & storms, through every tear & smile.

I'm still deciding if I should eat something. I'll go memorise the letter formats &amp;amp;& do some SS notes. :D So guai la, aiyo. I feel like I've a lot more than just these to blog about tday but.. I think I forgot. Shitsxz. I'll come back when I remember.

I wish I could really love you but I don't wanna hurt with the fugly truth.

It all comes down to who you think about when you fall asleep
<3.

2:59 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

I can't hardly breathe because I know I've lost you from my world
Shirl; You are still notttt online >:(
NatL; We need to talk soon yes NatL! :D
Nicole; We're from the same family, why would I hate them? Haha silly. (:
Alethia; Sure, no problem, welcome!
Puayleng; Haha keep a record or something!
Jovenelim; BestGirlFriend! :D I've decided to call us BestGirlFriends instead. BFs are too common. I love you jov. & you know it too. [:! Shopping, camwhoring && happy bitching time soon allright? Perhaps some time after my prelims since Shar & you have got no major exams to go for :(
Kasand; Hello sweets! :D I'll link you up reall soon allright! Meet up soon please! >:( frowns
Jasmine; Haha school's fine, thanks a lot. :D I hope everything's going good for you!
Akiko; You silly pok, stop _______ yourself okay! >:( I've come to a stop to all these so I think you should too. There's always a resolution to everything yeh? I'll always be here if you ever need someone. [:

Thanks for commenting y'all, keep doing so!

&&, I'm sure this time I'm not taking you back. So farewell & I love you.

SJC BLOGGERS: CLICK HERE!
Join & rate the blogs allright [:

Ahh, short day indeed (: It's only 255 in the afternoon now && I'm here lazing around, refused to study for my chinese text tmr. Okay it's not that I do not want to but my Chinese textbook is in school &amp;amp;& my shou ce is only for 4A book, don't have 4B. Heh. I'm damn lazy too la. I will never pass it anyway.

On second thoughts, I think I'll read the 4A shou ce for the sake of my Ns && my mom.

Last night, had a lovely chat with Qiaos on the phone for 105 minutes. Pert called, && now I know LH was his name. Nono, I'll leave it as initials. I don't like his name :X So Pert passed the phone to him && he talktalktalktalk non stop. =/ His life story is sad. He bloody hell happily took my number from Pert's phone & happily saved it as my cheena name. Ugh! He got home && accompanied Pert till she got home. Slept @ 230am. Damn dreadful & tired to attend school tday but well, it's just two & a half hours & I'll be free. Positivity, ay? Art paper was allright. All of us were so tired from the prep work. I'm so sick of Art, so fucking sick. The charcoal sticks dirtied my hands, nails & even arms. So frikkin' blackkkkkk.

After the paper, went to the Artroom with Sass & walked to the bus stop. While walking to the Artroom, there's this girll who was like "I ppppprovide you fullscap la." & Sass & I imitated her immediately "I ppppprovide you ay!" Haha together @ the same time! So coincidental. [: Met Yj @ the busstop. They two gonna have lunch while I'm taking 119 to Godma's place. Shyan came, Bestaye went home. Waited for 119, kept disturbing Sass & all. 119 came & I boarded the bus. [: && I realised something. I can be independent too. [:[:[:

Pert called on the way. I forgot that she said she'd call me @ 11am. Haha. She sound damn fucking funny! Got to Godma's house. Coco was barking like fuck, I swear. Fucking scary. I told Pert I'm damn scared & know what she said?

Her "Back back @ him!"
Me "Huh, he'll bark back!"
Her "Bark louder"
Me "I cannot win him"
Her "Of course la, your one damn niao niao kind."
-.-

My maid hid the dog before opening the door, hid him in the kitchen :D I can see him through the glass door & I was being a bitch by making faces @ him. Haha Auntie was laughing luh! The weather's frikkin' hot, really. Watched teevee && drank lemon barley. My used-to-be favvv drink. :D Nothing much on teevee though. Bummed around && left after Auntie's done with her work. [:

Took 119 back to Compass. This girl from Nativity Church Kindergarden was in the bus with her best friend Darren & their mothers was damnnnn cute. Haha her name is so unique! Yeo Yoke Mei Antonette. :D Her mom keep calling her "Netty!" Hahah, so cute la. The two of them were testing each other wordes for tmr's spelling. Damn cute. Her English is superb. I think it's even better than Zel's! =/

Got to Compass, had lunch with Auntie @ KFC! :D Heh. Godma gave us 50buckeroos. YAY! After lunch, got my magazines, a file for my art stuff & Chem guide book. LH says I'm turning into a bookworm 8) Which is good, I feel. Wanted to wait for mom but went home instead. Damn hot & tiring. 10 minutes after we got into the house, mom came back. I heard the keys so I ran to the door & scared her. Haha she jumped up la okay! Roflol. Showered, memorised the chinese letter format & used the com.

Mae's Ready & Waiting To Fall is stucked in my head.

Spinning around & around
Until my left was my right & up became down.
With just one look you knocked me off of my feet.
So unable to speak.
Oh how you made me weak.
Though it was a while ago, I still can recall.
That moment so ready, & waiting to fall.
Can you take me back in time
remembering when you captured my heart
Over and over again?

I'm doing avatars again [: But this time for different people. :D Haha many commented that it's nice. :D YAY! So in love with Christian Bautista's The Way You Look At Me. Fucking hell nice, I fuck swear. Amagawd! (Fucking bimbo I know)

"Can you not go, stay will you?"
I hope it doesn't mean anything to you 'cos I'm praying that it doesn't. I don't want it to mean anything either. I don't wanna hold hopes up too high. 'Cos I'm almost sure that my decision is certain. Ask me why am I leaving && I'm telling you, I really don't know. But I'm sure it's for the sake of my pain & memories that I can't take. Well, in other words, I'm running away from reality which I kinda hate it.

Qiaos & I talked on the phone last night & we caught up a little on our lives. I know, I KNOW! I told myself a zillion times before that I'm gonna be alone from now on which means I turn to no one, talk to no one about my heart. But fuck it, I did it again. So yes, we talked. Qiaos told me a lot about what she see from the Glynis she used to see & the Glynis she see right before her. She's one that watched me change gradually, watched me grow. I changed& I'm glad I did. I got stabbed too deep in the heart, I can't afford not to learn. I can't afford to let this heart bruise this bad again. She said I'm trying too hard to hide away from sadness that it's showing that I'm far from happy. I'm trying to make it not show but no, it's showing instead. I know, I'm forcing myself to laugh, to smile when I have to. But when I'm done faking it, I'm back to my emo self. She knows I've been keeping everything to myself, && she knows that I can't manage. (Look, I hate it when she knows me so well, really! ROAR) & I honestly do not know how am I gonna deal with this but well, until I find a solution to it, then I'll mend my ways. [:

Btw, I love you Qiaos. Though you can be such a bitch sometimes, though I reallyreally dying to tell you that I hate you for being the way you are, I still love you :D Hugs&kisses!

Tday I wanna thank God for putting all these people in my life. [: Especially for people whom taught me many precious life lessons. I love all of you & you have to know that. &&& I'm sorry for the long post, too much time to spare & I've got too much to say. Heh.



Pair of dirty old dancing shoes that fit.
<3.

2:35 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

And in the midst of this self inflicted pain, I can see my beautiful rescue


( Click to Enlarge! )

For Sharilyn!

For Jovene!

& myself (:

For my babes, I hope y'all like it (= Thanks for standing by me throughout this storm & now it's all well & good. Thank God I met y'all. [: If not I don't know what's gonna turn outta me. I love you both, always have & always will. <3

P/s: Time for us to do some lovin'! Shopping? :D

Short post for now, I'm kinda rushing though. Yesterday was a greeeat day, I'm sure (: Did revision, had tuition(finally), slept for awhile. I got damn pissed that I had to do it (DO NOT THINK SEXUALLY). I'm sorry that I hurt myself again this time, not as deep. I tried to calm myself down but failed. So I decide to sleep for awhile. && when I woke up, I definitely did feel a tiny winy bit better. I tried to sketch but no, I poked through the paper using the pencil with much hatred.

Dinner @ Aunt's place with Cousin. Shark fins' soup for dinner && I'm done. Fucking hell full. I ate a lot of Aussie chocolate! && seriously, I was damn hyper. :D Came home, talked to Pert. How now, brown cow, go & eat your tau sa bao! :D Heh. That funny guy's in a bad mood yesterday so we didn't get to talk. Watched teevee && slept @ 2am.

I love you saturday, I found joy & peace in you (:


Woke up tday @ 9plus. Watched teevee. Ate a little of breakfast & used the com. Talked to Natasha, Jovene && Sharilyn :D I'm gonna finish my art prep work tday. Gonna go visit Jermaine later :D Miss her so! I think I'll tryna photoblog tmr or something [:

I'll reply the comments, tonight maybe? Or maybe tmr after my paper. Wish me luck everyone. I hope I can do well though. =/ Pray for me, if you'd. :D

I love all of you. [:


I knew I loved you before I met you (:
<3.

12:58 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

A mejestic sunset lays in wait for that beautiful day

Jasmine; Hoho you can have it if you like! :D
Shirl; You're not online >:( frowns
Celeste; Thanks a lot babe, it really helps! :D You're really 'advanced' luh, so early wish!. Haha.
Maybelle; I wanna see you happyhappy ok!
Jasmine; Hey I guess I'll be seeing you tmr (:
Akina; Hohoho so shy. -blush. Haha smelly cos PE ma!
Akiko; Haha you're tiny & cuteee [: Thanks!
Yile; (: back to you.
Desiree; I know you do love me, please say that you do :D you take care too yeh!
Kasand; Hey girll, I'll link you up soon. (: Heh. Stay pretty aiights! :D I wanna see you tmr kay!

Thanks for commenting, everyone. (:

&&, what's left was just some broken hearts & a handful of memories.

I'm yawning away, feeling so fatigued & worn out. I only slept 12 hours in 2 days, how pathetic. Last night I had greeeat company. Called Pert up during her closing & her friend was disturbing her throughout, screaming, singing into the phone(&& his voice seriously turns me off like I turn off the teevee), laughing all the way. They were damn sick, oh god. Haha they're funny in a way la. That guy was damn lame & retarded la! And he entertained me throughout the night till 1plus without knowing his name. -.- Haha I was too busy laughing to ask. Shall ask Pert later (:

Ohohoh! Dad said "Fuck" this morning while he was driving me to school from Zel's school. Haha. 'Cos some driver was so moronic. Ugh almost got us into an accident, pffts. Racial Harmony Day tday & I swear SJC is being fucking retarded. I heard there was some shitz going on so they're gonna swap CD period with the first two period this morning. && yknow what! All they wanted to do was just some pledge, some speech & pictures. -.- It barely took 15 minutes dude. Then they talked about some school pride stuff & all. Some girls did the survey & we're under average. Which means not many of us like SJC. Which I think is veryvery true. :D So they asked us to do some survey yaddayadda.

Then we had something from the leaders & all, regarding the exchange program with this particular school. Omg, it's damn funny! They babysit ok. && their students there are like amagawd, you'll never ever study in there. In a period there's 30 minutes. They take 20 minutes to settle down & the rest of the 10 minutes to fight/ quarrel/ argue with the teacher & that's the end of lesson. TELL ME WHAT DO THEY LEARN THAT WAY! Ohmy, thank God SJCians are naughty in some ways but we do not do that. Phewww!

Class started & it's Chinese first. Copied zhao ju again, I'm damn hardworking oh yeah. Hahaha. Oh by the way, Mich & Bestaye skipped school. Fridays are Mich's off days -.- Bestaye wants to finish up Art at home -.- Hahaha damn funny la they two. Then we had Bio. Sat alone quietly @ the back, did my work! I love to isolate myself, I'm weird. Recess was just plain staying in class with Sass. Art was next. Helped Qiaolin in her stuff & all. Xiuwen & Tricia were being damn sweet! :D They made hearts for me. Tricia's one was.. Aw damn touching!

( Click to Enlarge! )

Xiuwen, to me.

Tricia, to me.
(The front)

Tricia, to me.
(The back)

I love they two. <3
Such little notes with pretty words would make me happy.

After that we had maths. Paper II again. >:( frowns. I got 35/60 for the last paper which is damn bad fuck. Sigh I just gotta work extraextra hardddd. :( Tday again, we left the classroom before dismissal prayer was said. Haha :D Waited outside the general office till they finished the announcements & left. Walked home with Sass & Yj 'cos they were going to Compass. :D

Got home, showered. Went Hougang Mall to have lunch with my Super Mom :D Had Cartel. Omg I'm so fucking full please, right up till now. :( I sinned so much tday. Haha I ate my favvvs :D Pepper Fish Pasta, Caremel Frappe & brownie with icecreammm! My first icecream of the month. Damn good girl, I knowwww. (: Took a train back, walked around Compass. Got my stuff, saw Persis, Yannee & Kelly! Walked home after that.

While we were walking around Compass, Zel's form teacher called. Zel harboured thought of committing suicide. For your information, my sister is only 10 years old this year, which is P4. Mom got really worried && I got really lost. Thanks to those fucking whores @ school for making my sister's life so fucking miserable. Hello kids, now that she's living in misery & suffering, are you happy now? Fucking whores. Esp that * person. & her friend. Omg I swear I wanna flick her forehead! Like how I did to Qiaolin. Though Zel & I quarrel alllll the time but hey, it hurts me to see my sister get bullied. & I hate that two bitches. That * girl stays near my place. Don't ever ever ever let me bump into her 'cos I willl lose control & kill her. Biiiitch.

Sat @ the dining table & mom started asking Zel about it, indirectly. I didn't eat, so I just watched. Observing the contours of her face, I see the younger Glyn. I was like that in the past. People bully me, make my life horrible, feel abandoned & all. I wasn't that strong, I cried almost all the time. Teachers & parents weren't involved though. I was good @ hiding. I'll always cry my eyes out @ Granny's place & whenever she asked, I'll just say nothing. I don't wanna let her know. But Zel was different. She didn't tell anyone of us but somehow this parent heard it from her & told her teacher. Still, she had people on her side. Unlike myself in the past, I had no one to rely on.

I told Zel this, "Fat, it's allright to cry but after you do, get over it, move on with life & let this friendship go. You wanna know why they always do this to you & you feel like it never ends? 'Cos you're showing them that you're affected. That you're miserable. That you're suffering in this misery. That you still want these bullshit friends as friends. Grizel, stand up for yourself && be strong. You can be on your own, why do you need someone? Why rely on others? You don't know when they're gonna walk out on you again. Be like me, I go dutch. And when you come home, you have the family. For you, you've got me & mummy & daddy plus auntie." I felt like hugging her & tell her that I love her too. 'Cos whenever she say, "Jiejie.. I love you." I'll say, "Ew disgusting la you, go away!!" I'm another bullshit sister. And I feel that whatever I've told her, it's like reflecting onto myself.. Does it? Kinda..

Tmr! Haha ice-skating & movie with Tricia & gang, then dinner with APP G7! :D Holycows, I miss those lovelies (: I haven't decide if I wanna go with Tricia they all. Shall see how things goes tmr. (: I planned to stay home to study though. Got tuition in the morning. Then I'll do my art prep work for prelims && finish up my homework, do some revising when I have the time.

Right I shall go do some work. [:


Black truth, White lies.
<3.

6:14 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

I've got some deep scars from a little black heart that's miles away
How busy I am right now but I still managed to squeeze some time for this entry [: I'm fucking tired now. I slept earlier than any other day this week but still, so deprived of sleep. Like what I told Yj today, I need another 24 hours of sleep or even longer to survive better. Haha! I'm deprived of love, company, time &&& sleeeeeep. :(

Ok before I talk about my dayyyy..
Happy 11th Monthsary to my dear Sassssss & Yj [:[: !! Happy to you both! I'm so used to seeing the two of you together so please don't ever ever part! I love to see you happy, Sass. & Yj, I love the way you make her happy. [: I love you both, from the bottom of my heart. <3

School was almost! fabbb. Thanks to Iknowwho for pissing me off allllll the time @ school, like oh Lord please save me. I do not wanna vent my anger on anyone, neither do I wanna tell anyone about this shit feeling. So I just gotta tolerateeeeee & endureeeee. So as I was saying school was almost! fabb. Morning was allright, just that I'm a littlesuper duper tired. I got up late too. Dad screamedddd @ me then I woke up. Haha.

Chinese in the morning was shitz. Lin lao shi is damn.. -.- Ugh shan't mention luh. I did her work though. Copied down the zhao ju & all, jotted down all the unknown words' hanyupinyin. I'm gonna give it a try for Chinese though, try my best la. Not gonna give it up. Who knows I get A or my chinese? :D Yeah bullshit. Haha. Lit was allright. The room was damn smelly, gosh! The class before that, I think was Akina's class, just had PE before that. So yeh, all sweaty & smelly. Hm so we had Chem after that. SGSS's paper is damn tough. I only got 9/50, tian ah! Ms Su dropped a big hint for us. She asked us to study the past exam papers 'cos Prelim paper is set by her & the questions come from there. :D YAY. Then we had recess. Stayed in class with Sassy!

SS was shitz. Ms Ng gave 2 Source-based & 1 Essay question but I only finished the Essay & 1 Source-based question. I don't know how to do luh. >:( frowns. Oh but I sat with my dear Xiuwen laogong :D She's damn funny & retarded & sweaty! Chinese again after that. I thought it was Bio. Haha. I wanted to go toilet & Yj don't allow la. -pouts. One period of Chinese then Bio, teo periods. Did the rest of Booklet 1, finished it all. I got 17/20 for the 2004 paper! Damn happy.

After school, went Hougang Mall with Mich, Qiaos & Sass! Accompanied Sass to get stuff & went to Mac's to have lunch. Bought bubble teaaa again :D Hohoho. Ate & we talked a lot while waiting for Yj to come. Sass asked me that question again & I gave a direct no without thinking & shook my head profusely. I've decided & I'm sure nothing's gonna change my mind. I'm used to being alone though I'm still fucking afraid. I don't need another person to come into my life, I have enough of such nonsense. & guess what Sassy said? "Good, we're here to support you k glyn. It's not about being alone here. You're far too nice to her already that she take for granted, take advantage. I don't think she's the one for you. You deserve so much more better than that. We're here to support you kay!"

I can't remember the exact words but this was somewhat what she told me. Yay! It's nice to know that they're right behind me while I'm fighting in this battlefield alone. [: So Yj came after awhile, with a stalk of Rose. Sweet, as usual. I liked the gift she gave Sassy! Damn sweeeeto. [:Oh then Pam was like "So y'all know what to do now right!" & we all just took my bags, had our goodbyes & left. :D Came home, showered & used the com. Webcammed with Zaeron the retard :D

A well, splendid day spent with the llovesss (:


Darius's Live Twice reminds me of ______.
Remember how you & I met? Remember how I'd act so shyly around you when I see you? Remember how I'd send you texts almost everyday? Remember how we used to text all day & night with the never-ending conversations? Remember how sweet these conversations were? Remember how one particular day of the month, we both would tell each other "Happy Anniversay & I love you dear. (:"? Remember how I'd always tell you, "Please forgive me if I didn't say I love you everyday"? Remember how you'd call me & just say that you love me? Remember how I always tell you that I'd wanna love you all my life, cherish every bits & pieces of you, treasure all the time we spend tgr & how you'd tell me how you feel & all? Remember how we used to promise we'd stay by each other's side till the very end? Remember how we said we'd still wanna be together when we're both in Heaven, go through every single shit together again? Remember how you'd wanna come up to my place to pass me chocolates when I was down to the lowest? That was the sweetest thing one ever did for me, for your infomation. Remember when I cried so bad over the phone & you scolded me then after that, you started comforting me? Remember when you were supposed to be studying while I'm on the phone accompanying you & you started playing games instead? Remember how much I've missed you when you gone MIA the other time? Remember how badly this heart was llooking for you, crying for you, reaching out for you that time? Remember my "I miss yous" & "I love yous"? 'Cos if you don't, I do. I always do & I always will. You're still on my mind, I can still find you in my heart but honey, where are you? You're gone, too far away this time.

I miss you.
Boy, come home soon.
Do you remember how we used to be?

***
You're such a contradicting fool. When I talked to you, you said "yeh, I agree" but when I mentioned it again, you said it can't be blamed. Ok whatever. I'm better off alone now. And you're so pissing me off badly. Very badly. Very super badly, I'm telling you now. I guess I no longer trust you like how I used to. Thanks uh, for being you. Please, I beg of you, don't make me hate you, detest you, dislike you all over again. I do not like the feeling of having you hated by me.

Right I had my piece & I'm damn pissed now. Feeling so upset, damn pissed & nostaglic. My sister is making it worst by wanting to use the com when I'm doing my Art. I'm really doing luh okay. >:( frowns. Right so I gotta go now, still damn pissed but acks, I'll be fine later. Shall go find my Happypill :D Heh. Um, I'll reply the comments another time I guess. Hey, thanks for commenting y'all! :D

You lied happily, I fucking hurt.


So pack your pain in a suitcase of lies.
<3.

6:02 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

This is the ending, here's my surrender
( Click to enlarge )


I lovehate you.

Love & love & happy afternoons
Watching TV from your room
While you're laying in my arms
& I know it's not fair to me
To see this love walk right by me
Every day, will we ever meet the right way
Again, again
Tonight I will sit next to you
To see if you act like we're through
To make you laugh is all I want
I'll hold you while tears fill our eyes

It feels like just yesterday when it happened. I'm too numb to feel the pain.

For your love, baby.

Alicia Pan's This Love is on repeat. Ohmy, fucken nice song I can't get enough of. Oh I finished my piano exams by the way. And I supposed I screwed it up. That examiner is so.. Omg scary! He's so tall & he's an ang moh la & it's like so freaky. Only the two of us in the bigbig room. I got damn nervous please. But whatever, it's over so no point dwelling over it. [:

I'm being supa random tday. [: Finding lyrics, poems, pictures, whatever. I'm gonna relaz for awhile before I start doing my Art again. Talking to Quek. She's coming home!! In another 24 days [: Heh I'll be counting down, I guess. Heh. Damn happy. I just cleared my pictures. Deleted quite a lot of things. I'm almost finished with my art. [: I'm gonna finish the last mboard & I'm off to finish up my prelims prep work. YAY FOR ME!

Definition of love?

Is when I met you (:

Another 32 more days to Glynis's birthday! :D
You're gonna ask me what I want for my birthday, yes you are!
-singsingsing &dance around (:

Time flies. Seriously, this year seems to be passing so quickly. It's so fast & I'm turning sixteen already. (: I'm walking the sixteenth year of my life, through thick & thin with my lloves. [: I grow, I fall, I pick myself up, I learnt. Thank God for putting everyone in my life & those who were in my life & left, y'all make a difference. You came, you stayed, you taught me, I learnt. You left for a reason or another. & for all those who're still here, I hope you'd still stay right here in my life, keep playing your part & I will keep lloving you. <3<3<3!

Spare me just three last words.
"I love you" is all she heard.
I'll wait for you, but I can't wait forever.
♥
I've got piano again later. & I don't feel like going. Ugh shut up glynis & do your Art now. Toddles!

***
Q: What is the quickest remedy for a broken heart?

A: The quickest remedy is that you must learn not to value love because it is requited. It makes no difference whether your love is returned. Your love is of value to you because you give it. It's as though you gave me a present merely because you thought I would give you one in return. This won't do. If you have love to give, you give it and you give it where it is needed, but never, never ask for anything in return. Once you've got that in your head, the idea of your heart being broken will disappear.

(Quentin Crisp, in an interview in The Wit And Wisdom of Quentin Crisp)

_,
IULOVYOE (:

Cut my wrist & black my eyes.
<3.

11:21 AM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

I told my heart I didn't want you but I lied.
For the fear of rejection, I kept my love inside.
(:

I'm on the phone with _ now, damn idiotic moronic bitch. (Yknow I don't mean it :D) Fucking tiring day, worse day ever! Slept @ 3plus 4am last night. Was doing my lit work while Pert called & we talked. Hung up, Zaeron called after awhile. Talked till she got tired & hung up. She called, so we talked till 3plus. Kept tossing & turning, & I keep seeing the scars..

(Whatever Glynis, whatever.)

I hope you're feeling better after pouring out. You know who you are & I don't wanna mention your name here for some reasons, for your good & perhaps mine. I hope everything will be fine for you & her, I hope things would work out, really. I pray that she's still right next to you whenever you need her, she's still the one you wanna hold no matter what happens. I hope nothing goes wrong between you two, I know you both would work out. You've found your happiness & well, as your friend, I'm overjoyed for you. Exams are nearing & please, for the sake of yourself, study hard & take care of yourself. Love!

With three hours or even less of sleep, I got to school with that pair of fugly eyes. Ohwell. Hymn-singing again,. Above All is nice & it's on download now :D Heh. Zaeron texted me this morning, comforted me & all. Thanks my dear! Chem test was allright. PE was fun. We were damn crappy or rather, I was damn crappy. I was feeling crappy, I want to be crappy. Ahhh, maths was allright luh. Did Paper I again. Quite tough, hopefully I can get good grades. Ahwell, although it's just a test, I gave in my best. (It rhymes!) Recess was allright. Stayed in Mrs Soon's homeroom & talked to the rest. I was trying to recall the dancesteps but no, I can never remember. I got horrid STML. >:( -frowns English was damn fucking bullshit, really fucking shit. Mrs Soon asked those who wanna pay attention to move in front while the rest stay behind. Damn whatever la okay. I stayed behind but I still paid attention to her. [: Damn lazy to move. Hm after English was Lit. Fucking boring, as usual. What's new man? I got 16/25 for that assignment we did last week :D Not the best but I improved! Heh. And Miss Yeo said I still need to improve on my English. Hahaha I know it's bad but I'm trying right! :D Had Australian English paper. I just anyhow shade & went to sleep immediately. Heh.

After the paper finished, cabbed home. [: Too fucking tired to walk & too afraid to be alone so I simply ignore that rule of mine. Showered, ate a little & off to do my Art. Now it's almost done. 6plus,dad came home & we went to Aunt's place [: Godma finally came, I missed her. Aunt Helen is damn.. Don't know how to describe her please. -.- Pearlyn was damn cuteeeee! Haha. Went home around 815 & continued with my work. Mom helped me & we kept fooling around. Hahaha. She's damn funny la. She used a lot of bluetacs please! Haha 'cos Grandpa owns a rubber plantation so I was like "Mummy, even if ahgong owns a rubber plantation, THIS IS NOT THE WAY TO WASTE IT!" Haha & she kept laughing. [:

Remember I said I feel like I'm happier? Tday I wanna take back those words & start crying instead. >:'( I've been saying so much, telling Pru to pretend & move on when she's going through almost the same thing as I do but I don't apply all that I've said to her to myself. I'm so jaded.

The scratch marks are becoming blueblacks! Like strip kinds. And it reminds me of.. Zebra!! >:'( -cries OHOHOH! & I GOT MY SONG ALREADYYYYY [: REJOICE EVERYONE, REJOICE! Um, it's This Love by Alicia Pan. YAY! :D

"Glynis."
"Uh yeah..?"
"I love you."
"Huh why suddenly say that?"
"Remember that I love you ok."
"Huh.. Orh."

Unfeeling.


There's Piano exam tmr. Please pray me, everyone. I hope I'd do well. And I'm skipping school tmr. I'm damn tired & I'm not ready to hand up my Art yet & I plan to study @ home & bullshits @ school are.. Indescribable. >:(

Goodnight, cruel world.
I don't wanna see you tmr.

I imagine the two of us together, but I've been living in reality.
<3.

11:34 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

In this sweet uncertainty affair, there's you & me

Rena; Truckloads of love to you!
Anne; Doing great (: How're you! Doing good? :] Take care yeh!
Celeste; Haha allright, see you babe. [:
Prunella; You've got me for all time babes. Don't worry, I'll be there when everything comes crumbling down again [: Remember what I said in the text this morning kay. I love you pru!
Connie; Yeh I will make some soon babes. [: when I have the time allrights. Check out my days. :( So damn busy & filled!
Shirl; Hey girll, thanks for commenting. [: Yeap it's getting better! Thanks for concerning yeh. :D
Caroline; I hope you're feeling good babes. I love you rolrol. [: hugs&kisses!

I'm still doing my Art & I'm not online. I'm giving all my attention on Art. My eyes are seriously shutting right now 'cos I slept @ 2am last night. =/ Couldn't get to any sleep luh. And I've seriously overworked myself tday, badly. My eyes are painful, & I made it worse by rubbing it with my hands. Wtf >:( -frowns

I'm sneezing & coughing away, fuck. Fuck mboards, I haven't even do up one yet. Glynis, you & your time management. >:'( School was damn slack tday luh. Haha, English was plain scoldings & going through compre paper. Maths was a-okay. Mrs Ong is still PMS-ing, though. Leeza was late for school & Mrs Ong asked her why she still come in for her class in that 'attitude' tone. -.- Damn pointless. I got 10/40 for my Maths paper II. Damn unexpected. Failed but I improved :D YAY. Chinese was bullshit. Lin lao shi said it's a miracle 'cos I finally decides to hand in her work. Damn evil, lao shi! I told her I won't do her work ever again. Haha. Qiaos said she's changing her name to "Lin Qiao Ye" instead of "Ye Qiao Lin" 'cos I did my work -.- Mich claims that the sun is coming up from the other side tday, now that I've done my Chinese homework. Thanks babes, what kinda 'ohsogreat motivation'. Hahaha. Lin laoshi kept the few of us back 'cos we didn't hand up the zuo ye. Ok I have everything with me but I didn't do the zuo ye. How'd I know I'd need to do la. Haha I wasn't paying attention, ok fine. After arguing & scolding, she decides to let us off after wasting 15minutes of our recess.

Bought stuff & went to Art class. Did nothing much. Listened to the radio, people-watched, talked, eat, fool around. Left immediately with Sassy @ 135pm. We didn't even say the dismissal prayer. :D HOHOHO KIDS. Whatever. (My nose damn irritating!) Took 119 to Compass. Bought Sassy's speakers & we took a train down to Hougang Mall. Took prints! Like finally, after 156415383 years of waiting. :) Went to get bubble teaaa! Then off to LJS to have lunch. Seriously, while I was eating I was thinking.. "Glynis, you're so much more than just a happier girll now though your life's kinda fucked up by bullshit others give you but hey, look @ you now! All good && definitely moving on." Ah, that feels good! -dances around.

Took train back, accompanied Sassy to wait for 83. Got home around 345pm. Showered & started on my work. Dinner & back to work again. I'm so fucking wornout now, seriously. I haven't had a good night sleep la okay. >:(

One more day to Piano exam & uh my mboard's deadline. 49 more days to Ns. Fuckadoodledee! Pffts. >:(

Somebody missed me tday, guess who guess who! :D Hehehe! Oh yes, don't fucking tryna steal my eyecandy away 'cos excuse me miss, you've got another boat waiting for you. [: This is mine, & it will be mine. So.. shoo off!! Ah well, damn tired. I'll go finish up the last bit & do my literature homework. Damn tired.

I wish Brian McKnight never sang Still, sigh.

Inside I'm screaming I love you.
<3.

9:54 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

You're the most familiar of strangers

Hello world. (:
C'mon guess who I went out with tday? I had so much fun with my favourite girll, Prunella Ong :D We went out for awhile, though it isn't long, we both had fun. [:

Met her @ Compass around noon. Babes, I hope you're feeling better allright! Hughug (: Allright then we went to KFC for lunch. We talked so much, like we've know each other in forever. [: After that, we went to the Library. Wanted to study but some soccer guys were so fucking stinko, so we moved to somewhere else. The guard came & told us to come around another day(chased us away luh, in other words) 'cos there's a lot of people who uses the bench on Sundays -.-

So we went to Starbucks instead. Saw the blogskinner Jolene! [: Ohmy, she llooks really sweet in person though. I got a shock when she called my name(ay she can pronounce it!) & go "Glynis! Hi I'm jolene!" Haha, so adorable. I was damn shocked, really! Ah well, then we found a place & studied. Actually we talked more than we did work. Haha expected anyway (: Did my english & when I was about to start on my Chinese letter-writing, some guy came & asked us to give our seats to customers who needs it more than we do, unless we order something, we're allowed to stay. Wtf another one -.- So I ordered my favvvvv oreo cheesecake [: Decided to watch Pru do her work instead. Talked a lot a lot a lot. [: Mainey called later on, I miss her! :D Heh, she sin't MIA la. Haha her com broke down & she's been real busy. [:

Stayed till around till around 3 & left 'cos Pru have to reach home by around 330pm. Wanted to get magazines but all not out yet. Walked Pru to the train station exit & went back home. I was talking to Him throughout the whole time. [:

Got home, got the computer scanned for virus 'cos it's getting slower day by day. Did my Chinese! Omg everyone please clap 'cos Glynis is doing her Chinese homework on her own for the first time in her Sec4 life. [: Had dinner. Nicenice Fried rice :D Zel used the com & I went to finish up my Chinese. Watched My Girl, the korean drama with mom. Damn funny show la! 830pm & came to use the com.

YAY. [:

Pru & I are talking about sex issues, roflol. I hope you're feeling better babe. I love you! Qiaos & I are talking about school. That bitch made me cried la kay. Asked me to go to her blog & check out some song. Omg, so fucking Glynis situation. So yeh, got it downloaded & now it's playing [: Super niceeee.

Oh Pru & I decides that we're gonna have that cloth thingy over our foreheads with the character REN in red on it. [: Diet starts tmr, Glynis! YAY. I'm coming home tmr, after school to finish up my mboards & do my art research for Prelims. Pru & I planned to be a good studying machine from now onwards & drive ourselves insane that we need not take our major exams. [: Haha damn nonsensical.

Dad made me damn angry just now & Glynis turned out to be damn scary. She went to scratch herself, her own self with her long nails & now her legs are.. swollen from the scratching & all. Her skin torn luh & kinda bleed. Fuck damn scary. I don't know who is she.

You're so dear to me.
I love you, Pru. (REN!!)
I love you, Mainey.
I love you, Pert.
I love you, Josh. (Bastard, where are you!)
I love you, Zaeron. (Paul's namessss!)
I love you, Qiaos.
I love you, Sass.
I love you, Bestaye.
I love you, Michellelim.
I love you, Shyanie.
I love you, Eliza. (I miss you!)
I love you, Jovene. (<3.)


[i am alone in e darkness feelin lonely]*[ITS TIME] says:
wife!!
dun sad le!!
i'm here!!
♥ GLYNIS says:
-shows the heart sign
i love you laogong.
[:
[i am alone in e darkness feelin lonely]*[ITS TIME] says:
ilove u too laopo!!
show e heart sign too!!

That's Xiuwen, by the way. [: I love you, Xiuwen. You never fail to make me smile in my days of loneliness!

Tmr's gonna be another lonely dayyyyyy. :(

I'm going to sleep now. Goodnight world. (:
Have fun @ school, work whatever tmr babes.

No one comments, how sad. :(

They heard I was good, they wanna see if it's true.
<3.

10:08 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )



9:42 AM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

So I'm counting the tears 'til I get over you

Eilis; Nonono, it's okay babe. [: I wanna see the happy Eilis too okay! Lovelove. You better study hard & all uh. Don't disappoint me kay! :D
Toi; Hello babe, I kindaaaa miss you! :D Haha. We'll bump at town again ok? [:
Jovenelim; Chill babe!! We're like talking online nowwww [:
Graceyeoh; I'm damn retarded now. Damn retarded mood yes. Hahaha. You can always look for me whenever you need me yeh? Thanks babe, thanks a lot. [:
Akina; YES YOU WILL [:
Mansurah; Linked (:
Jasmine; Yeh everything's fine. [:
Phyl; Hey girll, thanks a lot yeh. [: I will be fine in no time yeh. I know you care, Phyl. [: You're so sweet luh. I'm happy & retarded now. Haha fucking hyper. [: Oh babe, I'm always here yeh. Huggieshughug.
Alethia; Hello babe, thanks for commenting in here!

-
There's this thing that I wanna blog about but no, I don't have much timd now. I wanna go talk to Jasminek & I wanna watch teevee, play board games with the family (: HEHE SO HOMELY!

Talked to Pert, crycrycry then called Shawn. Ohmy, how much I've missed him! First time hear me cry over the phone, aren't you honoured asshole? (: Haha. Then called Kel! :D:D:D Conferenced & all. Theyre damn fucking funny la! [: Ah, I miss those times man :D Slept @ 1-2plus I think.

I'm on the phone with Zaeron now :D School was tiring tday. Lin lao shi was being irritating, as usual. She kept calling our names & all. Okay we didn't do her work & kept talking luh. Typical, isn't it? Haha. Lit was boring & sleepy. Yawns, really boring. Close to falling asleep. Chem was allright. Got back the last test paper & I got 18/47 :( Backside luh, I better work harder. Recess, bought stuff & went back to SS class. SS was boring, as usual. Miss Ng asked us to do essay & source-based questions again. Damn annoying. x( then it was Chinese again. We talked & all luh. I did copied down the homework &I planned to do my chinese homework. After that was Bio. Bio was allright la. [: We were planning where to have lunch & all.

After school, supposed to lunch with Qiaos, Bestaye & Shyan but mom called so I went to lunch with her instead. [: We ate Sakae tgr. Went to bank after that. Damn llong queue luh. But mom wanted to deposit money into my account, so it's worth the waiting. :D Went to get clothes for my maid & all. Then went to Popular!. :D YAY bought a new book. Wish Upon A Star, I hope it's nice. Haven't start reading it yet. Bought bubble teaaa & went home! :D

I wish I could bring us all back to a time when all of us were still called 'One'. I miss you, I miss all of you, dya know that? I bet y'all don't. I miss how we act so retarded in public & pretended like no one was around. I love y'all, I really do. In my heart, y'all still existed & I hope it goes the same to the rest of you. I miss hanging out with y'all. We're all so busy, so caught up with our own lives. And I guess it's time for us all to make some time for Us.

Here is my heart, there's a picture of us.
It's so lovey but I meant it. (:

Still on the phone. Gonna keep my stuff & check if there's work to do. :D Then I'm gonna disturb mummy & daddy in the room! Heh heh heh.

I'm meeting Feldy tmr. [: YAY that stupid guy. Gonna practise for the audition on Saturday. He's gonna play the guitar while I sing! :D More Than Words. [: Ohwell, wish me luck yeh. I hope I'd get in. Then I'd be performing on Unplugged night! I don't know when is it but I'll update it in my blog, so read my entries for info kay! :D

Ok going off now, still on the phone though. Zearon is retarded la. But not as retarded as I am. :D YAY Okay bye.


Love the lust, lust the love.
<3.

8:40 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

It's better to have lost love than paint a smile & pretend

Fucker you're so so so so sick. I barely know you for fifteen minutes & you asked to webcam !! Sick guy sick guy sick guy. Sick 22-year-old guy.

Talking about the webcam.. =/ Sigh. I bought it 'cos of her & we barely used it once. Ohwell, I still remember we were smiling to each other & all. I even gave her one damn ugly unglam kiss over the webcam. (HEHEHE SO SHY!) And I.. I miss her.

SHUT UP GLYNIS, FUCKING WAKE UP! YOU'RE SUCH A BITCH. SHE'S ALL OVER YOU & SHE'S GOING CRAZY OVER ANOTHER GIRL & NOT YOU BITCH. SHE DOESN'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU SO FUCKING MOVE ON.

Oh yes I will, it's so easy to say huh. Check out tday's entry title. =/

I want to cry & I will now. >:'(

Wellwellwell, day was allright. Went to school later again tday. I don't wanna be that fucking loner @ school. I love tday's weather though. It was pouring & rather cooling. I was thinking if it's also raining on your side. I was worrying if you were drenched & soaked while walking to the LRT station. I hope you weren't, I hope you're fine.. Flag-rising in the hall again, so irritating.

English was okay. Maths was challenging. Wtf, I hate Paper II. !@$^$#&(()#@!@ RAHH! I hate Paper II! I can barely do the paper. At most 3 marks, which is oh so pathetic. Stayed in SS class during PE. Recess, Mich & I ran all the way down to the canteen & back 'cos we left Sassy alone in class. Haha. She went off to change & we were supposed to be back in class by the time she finish changing. That woman thinks that SS class is located @ the first floor, next to the canteen. Hello, it's not. ( Omg I saw blue MSN tab, my heart beebop beebop. I want to faint & die & never wake up please. ) Ignore that, random. Oh by the time we got back to the class, she was already waiting for us. Haha (: SS was effin' boring, really boring I tell you. Art was fine, ever so smooth. :D Went home immediately after school. [:

Mboards deadline extended to Monday :D Miss Teh was being nice. I haven't even started D: I better start doing it soon, really. Maybe I'd skip tmr's movie date with them & stay home to finish up my work. I'm gonna do my lit later on, before I go to sleep.

_ calld last night & we talked, just before I was falling asleep. I told her the same thing that I'd say to Qiaos.
"You know something?"
"Yeah?"
"I really love ______ a lot, so fucking much. Why she doesn't see it? Why she doesn't appreciate what I've been doing? Why she just love me no more?"
"You know what? Whenever you think of her, think that you love her so fucking much, remember this. I love you more than she ever does."

I'm sorry. Very very sorry. I don't wanna give you false hopes like I did the other time. You should find your true romance & not mingle around with someone like me. Someone who don't believe in love, somehow. Someone who thinks love is such a bitch. Someone who is still deeply in love with the one whom she thinks is The One. And I know how bad it hurts whenever you call & you have to listen to my I-love-her talks. Sigh, I'm really sorry. I hope you'd find your love soon. [:

But every time I close my eyes, you're still inside my heart.

I am so scared. So fucking scared. My nightmares are returning & tell me what should I do. I'm gonna cry so hard tonight & I'm scared. I don't know what's gonna happen if I cry.


I'm going to finish up my work. There's SS notes to write & I didn't have the time to write, fuck.

X, I miss you.
And I love you so.
I hope you're happy. (Yes you are)

And I live today not for my friends but you.

Fuck glynis, what the fuck are you doing!?!

Ok bye.

You didn't love me, did you?
<3.

7:44 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

Listen to the whispers until somehow I hear melodies

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The last time you saw me was in a crumbled photograph that missed the bin.

Hello to all. :)
School was fine tday. [: Wenta school late, @ around 7plus. Qiaos & Nette was already there. Sat around & read my book. I'm finishing it, ohmy. Damn fucking nice. Went up to the Hall, saw Sassy with Yj. She thought I didn't come to school & she gave her :O! look when I walked towards here. Bitch. Hahaha. Had hymn singing after flag-rising. So dumb. New song though (: Really lovely with the tunes of the guitar, how lovely to start my morning. It'd be better if I start off my morning with just a text from you, nothing heartbreaking. First lesson was Chemistry. Had test again, finished it really quickly. I feel like I'm picking up. Hm, which is good though. Especially when it comes to Chem, a subject that I can go "YAY!" when I scored 4/50 :D No more single digit I hope.

PE was next, did nothing. Finsihed up my lit homework in Mrs Ong's homeroom. Sass' PE teacher is irritating. Hahah, had a test on Paper II during maths. Damn tough! Omg, I don't like! I will fail the test, for sure. I tried la, but the dumb graph! So damn stupid! Stayed in Mrs Soon's homeroom during recess. [: Finished up my lit & did English. Mrs Soon didn't really teach 'cos she was conducting oral for people who're having English oral this afternoon. (P/s: Good luck to all, in & outta school, whether you know me or not! :D) Then it was Lit. Super duper boring. :( Had assembly in the hall. Some students' investiture. Fucking boring. But Sass, Yj & I were laughing at nonsense. Hahah :D

Left immediately after school. Cabbed to Compass with Yj, Sass, Qiaos & Cecilia. [: Walked around for awhile & went back. I'm supposed to finish up my mboards. Damn lazy. I must finish it by this friday.

He "My girlfriend always say I got no time management one *laughs*"
Me "Hur, ______ manages my time for me.. "

He "Nonono, cannot! I promised her I'd get her Zara tops & she'd get me Levi's jeans"
Me "Huh, so nice. I wish I could still get her Levi's jeans as I intended to.."

Me "Ay I tell you something ok.."
Her "Yeah?"
Me "I really love ______ a lot leh"
Her (with the -.- llook) "I know"

Sorry that's fucking random.
But it's true, especially the last one..

Oh yesterday!! :D Met Qiaos & we went off to take train. Fucking excited, I swear. Getting all jumpy & bouncey. :D Met Liyana first. Bought bubble teaaa :D Heh. Sat around & waited till Feldy came! He's damn funny! Omg that funny shitz poopoo. His iPod Video only got like 48 songs!! Such an idiot. and the way he melts off the chair is funny. Haha. Junyou came a while after, then Ben. Walked to Taka & went to get stuff from Zara. Wth, he take damn llong time to decide what to get la. Haha. Went off to class at 730. Class was fine. Benedict Goh was the speaker. [: Dad came @ 915pm.

Your name was hanging by my lips, the whole day I was talking about you. That image of you in my favvv outfit of yours, standing in front of me, grinninng away, was stucked in my head for the whole day. I wanted to use my Bodyglove bag but I realised, it's stained with your scent. I don't want it to go away.

I'm so so so stuckedddddd on you, X.

Beautifully written letters, her scent on my bag, funny pictures of us, the significance of the broken ring, all of them lovely, all of them precious keepsakes of the person whom I used to call my love, but not her heart & her.

I'm going for dinner now. I'll come back home to finish up my mboards tonight. Fucking tired now. I'm dying to finish My Best Friend's Girl by today so I can get a new book tmr. Shitz, it's a Wednesday tmr. I'm stronger, aren't I? Yes I am. [: I'll go for piano happily & not think about anything else other than studies. [:

Scary movie with Sassy & Yj this Thursday. Studying session with Prunella this Sunday(like finally!). [: So happywappy Glynis.

My hearthrob. I found out something that I do not wanna know. I rather not know it. Oh, my hearthob. Sigh. The excitement is dying out, is it? Man, I hope not. >:(

I don't love you.
I do love you.
I don't.
I do.
Yes I do love you, Xavierlin.
But do you? -shakes head

Somehow it seems like you're really here..
But no. :(
<3.

4:36 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

Behind locked doors where no one has to know

I'm seeing you @ 545pm later, I'm hoping that time would race. (:
And you know something? We're talking in MSN. -runs around. I'm home; while you're at school. We're talking about our love & we're gonna shop for your gf's gift later on. I know I'm noble & a very, indeed, devoted lover. Heh.

School was greeeat with company of the lovelies (: 3am & it poured & caused the floor to be wet. Went to school, sat @ in the canteen instead. Read my book while waited for the rest to come. Qiaos came & Sass wiyth Yj came after awhile. Went to the Artroom, put down our stuff &amp; went to the canteen. Talked & all, went up to the hall. Fucking hot & stuffy, had flag-rising there. English was the first period. Sat with Sass, Qiaos & Yj. We really crapped a lot. Hahah.

Maths was next. Mrs Ong PMS sia. Went through the maths paper & all. I got 33/60, backside. :( Nevermind I'll try harder next time. Remember this was what you used to tell me? Even if I barely pass, you'd tell me that you know I've tried my best & know that I'm capable for better results. I miss your comfort. Then it was Chinese. Ohmy, damn horrible. Lin lao shi also PMS. Hahaha. Recess, ate with Qiaos, Bestaye & Shyan (:

Art was next. Miss Teh was niceeee (: Heh. Cut out all my pictures & sketches. Too little sketches I realised :( Gotta draw more though. We left school without saying dismissal prayer. =X Heh. Didn't bother much la, we just walked out. Dragged Qiaos to Compass just to accompany me. :D Thanks BF! Accompanied her wait for 83 & went home.

No one was home. Maid came back 10 minutes later then Mom & dad came in 5 minutes after maid did. Whoa. Hm dad didn't work tday 'cos he's sick! :( Daddy I hope you get well soon. :D Ate a little. Came online. Gonna meet Qiaos now then my hearthrob. :D

Fuck you're damn cute luh. [:

I'm a devoted cum noble & great gf, he says.
If he was my love, he'd be touched by what I've done, he says.
He envy you, you know?

This unconditional love will still flow for you, endlessly. You have no idea how much I love you, do you? I will never love another love like this. You're gonna be the only one that I'd do so much for, give everything for. Some people have waited a lifetime for moments like these. You're a greeeeat inpact in my life & I don't wanna forget you. Well, I will never.

You seem to move on easy.
It breaks me.

I love you, hearthrob.
But I love you more.

Leaving the house now, I can't waittttttttt. :D


You were stuck on my mind the whole time tday.
<3.

4:49 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )

Kill me while I still believe that you were meant for me

1:32 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )